A charming fellow, and so clever: he models himself on me.

I was born old and get younger every day. At present I am sixty years young.

Ladies, just a little more virginity, if you don't mind.

People are too apt to treat God as if he were a minor royalty.

Cynicism is the humor of hatred.

He is an old bore. Even the grave yawns for him.

God is a sort of burglar. As a young man you knock him down; as an old man you try to conciliate him, because he may knock you down.

The only man who wasn't spoilt by being lionized was Daniel.

A man never knows what a fool he is until he hears himself imitated by one.

I'll have that one, please.

A committee should consist of three men, two of whom are absent.

Yo Mama sucks so much d***, her lips went double platinum.

In science there is only physics all the rest is stamp collecting.

No country is so wild and difficult but men will make it a theater of war.

We need more drag king role models for all those interested in the art

I’ve had the pleasure of hearing The Novelists perform live. They are gifted songwriters and talented musicians with strong lead voices. This is a band with lots of heart & soul.

That experience which does not make us better makes us worse.

Cruel, but composed and bland, Dumb, inscrutable and grand, So Tiberius might have sat, Had Tiberius been a cat.

We think of death and loss as tragic twins, but in fact it is loss that hurts us.

What can you conceive more silly and extravagant than to suppose a man racking his brains, and studying night and day how to fly?

Image and appearance tell you little. The inside is bigger than the outside when you have the eyes to see.