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Sarcasm Quote of the day
What are American dry-goods? asked the duchess, raising her large hands in wonder and accentuating the verb.American novels, answered Lord Henry.
It is most remarkable that Lincoln, when he saw so much that was vulnerable in the leadership of the Church, did not move to the opposite error and become a scoffer.
I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better.
Were you born stupid, Heinrich, or did you have to study?
I cannot speak well enough to be unintelligible.
October: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.
I stood for almost an hour in a line of shuffling, bitter - eyed late mailers (Christmas is such a carefree, low - pressure time - that's one of the things I love about it), ...
I suppose the latest thing is to sit back and let Mr. Nobody from Nowhere make love to your wife.
Oh no, praying is great, without it the thumbscrews and the Iron Maiden probably never would have been invented.
. . . they would rather sneer at us and be smug, because we 'fail' to see what they are driving at. If indeed they are driving at anything--obscurity is usually the refuge of incompetence.
He has got no good red blood in his body, " said Sir James."No. Somebody put a drop under a magnifying glass, and it was all semicolons and parentheses, " said Mrs. Cadwallader.
Don't believe everything you read on the Internet.
Named Harris, " Bill said. "Ever know him, Mike? He was in the war, too.""Fortunate fellow, " Mike said. "What times we had. How I wish those dear days were back.
Valkyrie smiled patiently. "I like how you do your make-up. Do you use a brush, or just dip your head in the bucket?
In my opinion, I think sarcasm and humor in a song, without turning it into a novelty song, is really charming.
What does your birth date say about you? You are old!
Wow, " she said. "It's like you're teaching me something and being all wise.""You are not easy to get along with, " Skulduggery said.
It’s bad enough barging into Guild property, but we’ll get into really serious trouble if we shoot anyone. Lord Vetinari won’t stop at sarcasm. He might use’ - Colon swallowed - ‘irony.
Vampires were always either trying to kill me, or own me. God I hated being popular.
Think of it as an eight-dimensional onion.’ Justine straightened her back and gave her father an exasperated look. ‘Thanks, Dad. That’s helpful. I always think in those terms, it really helps a lot.
I’d heard street food was a big thing here in Mexico but I didn’t think it meant the creatures that lived on the street.
He said, “If God lived on Earth people would stalk his Facebook page and leave nasty comments on his Pinterest site.” Then it sunk in- timing was everything and social media was the devil.
…believing sarcasm and rude remarks kept the monsters at bay. They didn’t.
Whatever you are, do not even assume that you will be surrounded and gnawed by luxurious worms of an exquisite breed.
Say this one time with me: "Would you like that in a pump or a loafer?"... Good. Now memorize it, because starting tomorrow, the only job that you're going to be able to get is selling SHOES!
I also don't turn into a bat or sparkle in the sun. Hollywood's portrayal of vampires is almost as accurate as its portrayal of prostitution in Pretty Woman.
Going to the gym at this odd hour didn't 'work out' for me.
Sarcasm is a manifestation of anger, and anger can make you the puppet of your opponents.
Resilience, thy name is Devine.
I get my share of mud flung my way, but the secret is to dance in the rain and the mud will wash away.
Women do not lie about their age. In fact, no woman ever has, its just that memory is the first thing to go.
Life has a whimsical way of kicking you in the throat. I find it tobe one huge cosmic joke at our expense, only nobody is laughingbut the forces that be—given that they are even a wee bit human.
All right, we need a way to get inot the palace. Any ideas?""Ask nicely? Charge in? Fly? Wait, do you mean reasonable ones?
Never trust your colleagues. Work politics are founded by them.
I suppose that I found out two more constituents of the eternal engine: folly and curiosity.
The more this guy talked, the more he sounded like a fortune cookie.
By the way, if you get mad at your Mac laptop and wonder who designed this demonic device, notice the manufacturer's icon on top: an apple with a bite out of it.
I love having to attend the one class that is being taught by a professor who feels that their class is the only class being taught at the University and gives nothing but busy work.
That's one way we differ, Jaime and I. He's taller as well, you may have noticed.
In the battle of DNAs, your DNA will always win against the DNA of your father.
Are you insinuatin' that my daughter is a liar?""Oh, no, not at all. I'm saying your daughter is a liar. Surely you can appreciate the difference.
Enormous? Did you just call me FAT? I am not fat. - Jace
Normally ghosts didn't scare him. (Assuming, of course, Gaea hadn't encased them in shells of stone and turned them into killing machines. That had been a new one for him.)
Son, my dad said, every man needs a bitter, resentful woman in his life. Because there's nothing more touching to a mother's heart than to know that her son thinks of her constantly.
I don't know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point.
My whole day has been a unicorn ride through a field of rainbows
How Gloomy it is, to pause, to cease and to rust unburn, to get used and be indistinct. Like to live is to breathe.
The key to humor is often self-loathing or sarcasm. In a sense, that's how self-loathing is made palatable.
Oh I'd be more than happy to hold, I'll just spend the time working on that brain tumor.
Mary, ' said her mother. 'We don't like sarcasm ' 'You mightn't like it, ' said Mary. 'But I love it.