Mark Twain Quotes

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.

How easy it is to make people believe a lie, and [how] hard it is to undo that work again!

You meet people who forget you. You forget people you meet. But sometimes you meet those people you can't forget. Those are your 'friends

Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful day of your life.

Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

If voting made any difference they wouldn't let us do it.

Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe.

To be great, truly great, you have to be the kind of person who makes the others around you great.

The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and starting on the first one.

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.

The trouble with the world is not that people know too little; it's that they know so many things that just aren't so.

Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

Success is a journey, not a destination. It requires constant effort, vigilance and reevaluation.

When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.

Why waste your money looking up your family tree? Just go into politics and your opponent will do it for you.

Just because you’re taught that something’s right and everyone believes it’s right, it don’t make it right.

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.

If we would learn what the human race really is at bottom, we need only observe it in election times.

Focus more on your desire than on your doubt, and the dream will take care of itself.

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.

No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot

Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

Some people get an education without going to college. The rest get it after they get out.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.

Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.

If we were meant to talk more than listen, we would have two mouths and one ear.

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

It's better to be an optimist who is sometimes wrong than a pessimist who is always right

Good judgement is the result of experience and experience the result of bad judgement.

Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

You feel mighty free and easy and comfortable on a raft.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.