Remember the poor, it costs nothing.

Laughter is the fireworks of the soul.

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.

Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.

The miser and the glutton are two facetious buzzards: one hides his store, and the other stores his hide.

Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first.

Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.

Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.

The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.

I can ask for cigarettes in every language

Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.

My hardest job has been to keep from being a millionaire.

Young men still desire women as much as ever, even though they don't want to marry them as much.

Ukraine announced plans to open Chernobyl, their nuclear disaster site, to tourists. They say it's just like Disneyland, except the 6-foot mouse is real.

If it is important do it everyday

My writing comes not from the happy moments, but from struggle and grief.

A lot of the music that I grew up loving has a really political bent to it.

I'm a very stereotypical person... and that's part of my flavor, I guess, because I tell it like it is.

Few concepts are as basic as the role of workers in our economic structure and their participation in equity ownership.