If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

Don't play the victim role, empower yourself instead. Place yourself and others around you in a position to win.

His voice is hoarse. "I am going to make love to you now." He says, "So if you want me to stop, tell me."I shake my head frantically. If he stops at this point, I'll probably die.

Rules of science.” Alessandro shrugged his elegant shoulders. “And what are those? We don’t even know how this works.” He pointed to his head.

Wish and Wisdom are pals. Wisdom consoles at the fall of Wish and Wish cheers up when Wisdom is at wrong foot!

The trouble with socialists is that they let their bleeding hearts go to their bloody heads.

The truth is, after all the declamations we have heard, that the Constitution is itself, in every rational sense, and to every useful purpose, A BILL OF RIGHTS.

If rowing is a trial then the ergometer is the courtroom, the meter is the jury. And an honest jury at that, because the numbers do not lie.

If you stop complaining and asking for what you never will get, you will have a good life. A good life is not measured by any biblical span.

This is my dream being lived out and I'm so thankful for that.

Human requirements are the inspiration for art.