Jim Davis Quotes

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.

Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.

I never met a lasagna I didn't like

Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you're in it, but the longer you stay, the more wrinkled you get.

There are so many opportunities in life, that the loss of two or three capabilities is not necessarily debilitating. A handicap can give you the opportunity to focus more on art, writing, or music.

Life is like a Ferrari, it goes too fast. But that's ok, because you can't afford it anyway.

Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them.

It's amazing what one can accomplish when one doesn't know what one can't do.

Good morning is a contradiction of terms.

When all else fails, look cute.

I stop short of being a workaholic.

If you are patient...and wait long enough...Nothing will happen

When in doubt, pig out!

Usually I commit to something in my head and then I start drawing.

Nothing spoils lunch any quicker than a rogue meatball rampaging through your spaghetti.

You'd have to go a long way to find someone who was more proud and grateful for what our veterans have done for all of us.

He who fills His pockets with the Rocks of Misdeeds shall surely sink in the River of Good Fortune.

I have a fear of letting my mind wander. I'm afraid it might not come back.

In my head, the sky is blue, the grass is green and cats are orange.

Great chefs know it's the appearance of food that counts...but great eaters know its the amount of food that counts

Jon: Our only thought is to entertain you! Garfield: Feed me.

My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh.

There is never a need to outrun anything you can outwit.

I thought you were dead, Mr. McCandles.

When you're through with your cat, you can't throw it in the trash.

I was very happy and honored to create the Professor Garfield Foundation with Ball State to make reading fun.

You have to do something when you're lying in bed. So you play with your mind.

I didn't have a whole lot of success getting dates, I was always a bit of a geek.

I probably get more inspiration for human stories and idiosyncrasies than I do animal stories.

I can go everywhere and no one recognises me.

Deep fry that sucker! - Garfield

The understatement is the English contribution to comedy.

I was in and out of comas until I was nine and I would lose entire days and weeks. The novelty of being able to really do stuff hasn't worn off - I still feel like I'm making up for lost time.

I'm still a farm boy at heart. If I hadn't suffered from asthma as a child, I would be a farmer today.

We have a group of people now who think they own the state. Its disgusting.

I thought if I could create a convincing cat I could say and do anything I wanted on the human condition.

Cats are anthropomorphised in art because they are so laid back that you automatically attribute human thoughts and feelings to them.

There's only one thing to do in crisis like this - SLEEP ON IT!Garfield, the cat.

Jon: Our only thought is to entertain you!Garfield: Feed me.