When I was 17, I read a profile of Carol Leifer. Since then, I wanted to be her. I still want to be her.

Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

We need to stop telling girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't.

I do love poop. I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants. I enjoy being clever and pithy and political, but nothing's going to get me like dumb stuff.

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.

I hope the Jews did kill Christ, I'd do it again in a second.

Drew Friedman isn't just a brilliant artist. He takes you to a place. He takes you back in time. He makes you smell the stale cigarettes and cold brisket and you say, thank you for the pleasure.

They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

I like talking about things that are taboo, because it makes them not taboo anymore.

Comfort zone has the most comfortable bed in life where dreams become alive in your mind but never become a reality because you never get up from bed to make it happen.

There’s a star in the sky that refuses to stay put, and Hadley realizes it’s actually a plane, that just last night, that star was them.

There is an incredible amount of magic and feistiness in black men that nobody has been able to wipe out. But everybody has tried.

I want people to be afraid of the women I dress.

The true artist helps the world by revealing mystic truths.

They see me rollin’, they hatin’

In school I was pretty quiet. Kinda shy until my junior year. But at home I was a freak.

But if you can plant yourself in stillness long enough, you will, in time, experience the truth that everything (both uncomfortable and lovely) does eventually pass.

By all implies marry if you get a great wife/husband, you are going to be pleased. If you get a bad a single, you are going to become a philosopher.

There's a certain class of people who will do you in and then remain completely mystified by the depth of your pain.