Drew Friedman isn't just a brilliant artist. He takes you to a place. He takes you back in time. He makes you smell the stale cigarettes and cold brisket and you say, thank you for the pleasure.

Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

We need to stop telling girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't.

I do love poop. I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants. I enjoy being clever and pithy and political, but nothing's going to get me like dumb stuff.

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.

I hope the Jews did kill Christ, I'd do it again in a second.

They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

I like talking about things that are taboo, because it makes them not taboo anymore.

I commend you on all you've done for PETA, wrestling the one-eyed trouser snake with your bare hands, gently cuddling it in your arms, and nurturing it back to health.

The world is neither good nor bad.Don’t judge it, just love it.

The more you love, the more love you are given to love with.

Let's get out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini.

Did it ever strike you on such a morning as this that drowning would be happiness and peace?

Hopefully I don't have to play for eight years but can go and relax somewhere and do something enjoyable while I'm still young.

You can cage the songbird, but you can't make her sing. And you can trap the free bird, but you'll have to clip her wings.

Music begins and ends in the air - it's got to be shared.

Writers are liars my dear, surely you know that by now?

In the faculty of speech man excels the brute; but if thou utterest what is improper, the brute is they superior.

For me, it [Crimea] is not borders and state territories that matter, but people's fortunes.