Tinsel is really snakes' mirrors.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

The intention that man should be happy is not in the plan of Creation.

Resolution demands a sacrifice.

Demonise one of them and the sympathisers will melt away.

Architecture is a rare collective profession: it's always exercised by groups. There is an essential modesty, which is a complete contradiction to the notion of a star.

I know it's important to do more than just complain when there's something you don't like. You need to try to do something about it, or you're nothing but a whiner.

Every morning, I wake up trying to be the best mom and the best role model for my kids in a healthy diet and active lifestyle.

And I hope you find it, what your looking for, and I hope it's everything you dreamed your life could be and so much more

Meal isn't over when I'm full. Meal's over when I hate myself.

Advertising is a symbol-manipulating occupation

I'm not cruel, sir, I won't shoot you in the guts, but I will make you realize how much you took your toes for granted.