There are more social skills required to talk one-on-one [than to an audience]. You don't have to be socially fluid to talk to two thousand people.

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.

These pretzels are making me thirsty!

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

The IRS! They're like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

So let me get this straight. You find yourself in the kitchen. You see an éclair in the receptacle... and you think to yourself: "What the hell, I'll just eat some trash."

People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.

Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success.

Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.

There is no economic law that says that everyone, or even most people, automatically benefit from technological progress.

What are you - Secret Service?''If I were, I wouldn't admit it.''And you're not admitting it, I notice.

If you're not open, you're not transparent, you're still holding on to vaults of information, you're not going to build that trust.

If you want to reap financial blessings, you have to sow financially.

When I date different guys, I just have to stay away - and not let myself fall. Because if I do, it's over.

I like period drama because everyone is so restrained, but they have all these emotions raging underneath.

But I confess that "my mind to me a kingdom is" - not! Rather it is a fantastical republic, daily troubled by more revolutions than ever occurred in South America.

When even those who should be happy by any reasonable measure are also not happy, there's got to be a serious systemic problem in humanity's culture.

You know raising a family in the lifestyle of a professional athlete can be very difficult.

All rooms ought to look as if they were lived in, and to have so to say, a friendly welcome ready for the incomer.