There's one form of bigotry that is still acceptable in America - that's the bigotry against the successful.

Government is not the generator of economic growth; working people are.

Quite frankly, I think nothing could do more to immediately bolster national security then enabling us to produce more oil and gas here at home at a price consumers could afford.

I love Texas because Texas is future-oriented, because Texans think anything is possible. Texans think big

We're going to keep building the party until we're hunting Democrats with dogs.

I'm carrying so much pork, I'm beginning to get trichinosis.

Half the world does not know the joy of wearing cotton underwear.

Balancing the budget is like going to heaven. Everybody wants to do it, but nobody wants to do what you have to do to get there.

We're the only nation in the world where most of our poor people are fat.

I own more shotguns than I need. But less shotguns than I want.

I look at subprime lending and I see the American dream in action.

Don’t lose faith in the people.

...and yes that was meant to be interpreted in a sarcastic bubblegum tone complete with clapping and jazz hands.

We do not innovate anything ... How is it that novelties are introduced which were never even thought of by our predecessors?

My credit card company calls me if it looks like I've bought too many hoodies and cargo pants for my kid at Old Navy.

I learned to fly planes at fifteen years old because one of my teachers thought I'd be a better pilot than rapper.

I love doing meta-humor, as long as it doesn't become too distracting and it's subtle.

remember that though humility, without firmness, may be cowardly, yet courage without humility is presumptuous.

In America-as elsewhere-free speech is confined to the dead.

I am a big barbecue-sauce guy.