There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.

Ultimately, making movies, if you don't have a big star, it's hard to do. Or if it's not a star director.

unloved women have no biographies-- they have histories

At USC, if you're running back there, and you do gain you over 1,500 yards, people see you as a candidate, but not one of the top ones.

I think serious situations actually make for the best kind of belly laughs. But theyre also the hardest to convert into comedy at the outset.

You know why there are so many whitefish in the Yellowstone River? Because the Fish and Game people have never done anything to help them.

You are who you choose to be.

What's given to dunya is lost forever. What's given to Allah is never lost. If you give what you love, for the sake of what He loves, you'll have what you love forever.

We do not want to destroy any people. It is precisely because we have been advocating coexistence that we have shed so much blood.