I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

Sometimes I think my head is so big because it is so full of dreams

We were going to get Ahmed back. And Rahim back. And Shazad. And Delila. And all the others who had been captured. And we were going to end this.

It probably takes many years of monastic practice to equal the spiritual growth generated by one sleepless night with a sick child.

The end comes when we no longer talk with ourselves. It is the end of genuine thinking and the beginning of the final loneliness.

Life consists of two sides ... light and dark. Joy and sorrow. Without a balance, one cannot fully experience a full and well-rounded life.

It is no exaggeration to say that without Scripture a Christian life is impossible.

My wife doesn't care what I do when I'm away, as long as I don't have a good time.

McEnroe respects one guy -- himself, and that's it.

Honesty is incompatible with amassing a large fortune.

Recognizes ever and anon The breeze of Nature stirring in his soul.