I didn't squawk about the steak, dear. I merely said I didn't see that old horse that used to be tethered outside here.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.

We humans are different - our brains are built not to fix memories in stone but rather to transform them, our recollections in their retelling.

It was hell to be so tired, and still care.

Treating your adversary with respect is striking soft in battle.

Optimists are usually wrong. But all the great change in history, positive change, was done by optimists.

If you have the Holy Spirit and let Him take charge of your life, it doesn't matter what your situation is, He'll turn it around for your good.

An American religion: Work, play, breathe, bathe, study, live, laugh, and love.

If you are a human being, you might as well face it. You are going to rub a lot of people the wrong way.

I've taken salsa classes. I love dancing and I love to karaoke. So I bought a microphone with some tapes and my son and I karaoke. I know the entire 'Dora the Explorer' soundtrack.

Do i really want him dead? What i want... what i want is to have him back.