... the running shoe ... could be called the Swiss Army knife of footwear ... What appeal is there to a shoe whose only selling point is comfort?

What do women want? Shoes.

What becomes of the broken-hearted? They buy shoes.

Planning your own coming-of-age experience may wither you prematurely, but just think of it this way: If you can get through this, childbirth should be a breeze.

Of all the wonderful things that men and women share, shoes, tragically, are not one of them. This is because men lack the shoe chromosome.

Walking in high heels should be made an Olympic sport.

Remember when you were eleven years old and you thought how great it would be to get your period? And then you got it? That's what planning a wedding is like.

Even if you're fat, one thing always fits: shoes.

In LA, it's the law that you must be engaged in writing a screenplay with your hairdresser, pool boy, personal trainer, life coach, dog walker, or yoga instructor.

Your wedding will not be what you think it is going to be, no matter what you think it is going to be.

I wasn’t invited to be on staff at the Simpsons because they didn’t want any women on staff at the time.

A fool can easily be known(identified) by what proceeds from his or her mouth.

What makes you different is the exact thing that makes you irreplaceable.

I waited for something, something died.So I waited for nothing, Nothing arrived.

I'm a big believer that life changes as much as you want it to.

For love to flourish there has to be trust. Promises don’t matter as much as personal choice.

If I were doing five cop shows, I'd probably start struggling to find an identity for each one and struggling to find inspirations.

A leader has to keep saying the same things over and over again.

The earth is mostly just a boneyard. But pretty in the sunlight.

Your brain works with all the subtlety of a malicious child.

Not surprisingly, troubled economic times often beget proselytizers of wacky, extreme ideas.