Those North Korean hackers are at it again. Earlier today they leaked Santa's naughty list.

Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger.

They say there are about 12 million illegal immigrants in this country. But if you ask a Native American, that number is more like 300 million.

Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?

I feel like Bush presidencies are like "Godfather" films. You should stop at two.

I was Christmas shopping and ran into a guy on the street. I noticed his watch and said that it runs slow. He said, "So does the guy I stole it from."

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know? some of these jokes just write themselves.

Way too much coffee. But if it weren't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever.

Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late.

Don't be afraid of challenges. Let them take you somewhere new.

Don't talk for five minutes, there's a good chap! I've a strange feeling come over me--almost as if I were going to think!

We are sailing in different boats and possibly we may possess a superior boat

...to forget you..this girl can never do....

Review your goals twice every day in order to be focused on achieving them. “Focus on your potential instead of your limitations.

Love decreases when it ceases to increase.

Looking for pleasure is the best way to ensure you won't find it.

What a quality of innocence people have when they don't expect to be harmed.

We are all mediators, translators.

Narrative and characters have always interested me. I never tried to alienate an audience. Of course, gradually, I wanted a bigger and bigger space to draw people in, so it's very organic [growth].