If you want more development in your relationship, move to an urban area.

Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.

The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes.

The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.

Pure joy is rare. That’s why for every meal I eat a really bloody steak.

Mom always said I was born to sit in the electric chair, but I'm proving her wrong. I'm going to die on my knees, begging for my life.

I bet there are a lot of women out there who want to sleep with a guy who reads. And being the head of the reading foundation, I’m very well endowed.

I love working with my hands. My writing is rough, my paper bruised with ink stains.

Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion.

Education: learning to find your purpose. Upon finding your purpose: what did I learn?

If all women revealed their age, men would have nothing to hide from each other.

What makes a person unique is their vision, their belief, their passion, and their flat out unwillingness to give up.

Happy is he that chastens himself.

But thinks, admitted to that equal sky, His faithful dog shall bear him company.

Those who do not look upon themselves as a link, connecting the past with the future, do not perform their duty to the world.

My inside self and my outside self used to match. A compass needle pointed true north. Now the needle spins around and around indicating the sad direction of nowhere.

I'm making records, my fans they can't wait. They write me letters, tell me I'm great.

In reality, there are very few villains who view themselves as villains. They just have a certain agenda at a certain time.

Food is all about balance; it is all about taste.

I've never seen an obese person who has said, 'I am well in my mind.' Happiness stops food being a compensation.

Al Gore is an heir to the old czars and commissars. He never saw a regulation he didn't like.