Mom always said I was born to sit in the electric chair, but I'm proving her wrong. I'm going to die on my knees, begging for my life.

Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.

The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes.

The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.

Pure joy is rare. That’s why for every meal I eat a really bloody steak.

I bet there are a lot of women out there who want to sleep with a guy who reads. And being the head of the reading foundation, I’m very well endowed.

I love working with my hands. My writing is rough, my paper bruised with ink stains.

Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion.

Education: learning to find your purpose. Upon finding your purpose: what did I learn?

If all women revealed their age, men would have nothing to hide from each other.

Bike lane: the section of the road that accommodates wide loads and has speed bumps to protect drunk drivers.

Never spit in a lion's face when you've got your hand in his mouth.

They told me it was impossible so I tried and failed. Then I tried again and again until I made it possible.

Learn to be Positive always. In pleasure or Pain, in Sun or Rain, in Loss or Gain, always be POSITIVE!

Unfortunately what came out of it was also kind of an imitation community with a lot of mindless conformity.

The separation of the Arabs from the rest of mankind has accustomed them to confound the ideas of stranger and enemy.

There are two ways to become famous. Degrade yourself or have talent. The first way is easier.

Every time we look at the Blessed Sacrament our place in heaven is raised forever.

Heartbreak has an archetypal core, all heartbroken individuals suffer from the same kind of torture.

If you're working on something that isn't very demanding, isn't very fulfilling, then you have all this energy to burn, and you can go crazy.

I just want to push the barriers and see what I can do and how far I can go. I am just determined and driven.