I went to the Missing Persons Bureau but no one was there.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

Never compare yourself to others because you are unique and beautiful in your own ways.

Words are good servants but bad masters.

I feel like a lot of the industry and media portray this image of what beautiful is, or how you should dress, or how you should look, and I don't think it's healthy.

As American productivity, once the exuberant engine of national wealth, has dipped to an embarrassingly uncompetitive low, Americans have shaken their heads: the country's old work ethic is dead.

Directing is like cooking, it's like cuisine. You cannot make a great dish with bad ingredients. I have great actors, and I'm putting them together. That's all I'm doing.

As you stopped to say hello, oh, you wished me well, you couldn't tell that I'd been crying over you.

Let the wealthier countries and corporations of the world fund an Emergency Organization.

I'm from the ADHD generation, to be honest - I genuinely was on Ritalin in middle school - so I'm most comfortable with a hundred things going on at once. It's deadlines that get pesky.

The world wavered and quivered and threatened to burst into flames.

We need only in cold blood to act as if the thing in question were real and it will infallibly end by growing into such a connection with our life that it will become real.