I have a large sea shell collection which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world. Maybe you've seen it.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

He was very good, it turned out, at outlining the flaws in the government as long as someone else was in charge of the government.

I was born in Long Branch, New Jersey, and no one had ever taught anybody that young, back in those days.

A beautiful woman, if poor, should use double circumspection; for her beauty will tempt others, her poverty herself.

In a climate where people don't understand the numbers, newspapers, campaigners, companies, and politicians can get away with murder

War is indefensible on every grounds, military and economic and diplomatic and also on moral.

Insecurity isn't an attractive quality in a man.

I don't know that I would need to be famous as a Middle East policy expert to see that unilateral imperialism is bad policy.

The vegetarian movement is an ancient movement and is not quite a modern one.

Who knows, I have always lived one day at a time. Probably more adventure and excitement.

I never go anywhere without my iPod.