Quote of the Day
Authors Categories Blog Quote Maker Videos
 

Erma Bombeck Quotes

Find the best Erma Bombeck quotes with images from our collection at QuotesLyfe. You can download, copy and even share it on Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp, Linkedin, Pinterst, Reddit, etc. with your family, friends, colleagues, etc. The available pictures of Erma Bombeck quotes can be used as your mobile or desktop wallpaper or screensaver.


Erma Bombeck Quotes: "There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.




Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for go live with a car battery."

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for go live with a car battery.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them."

All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.




Erma Bombeck Quotes: "One certainty when you travel is the moment you arrive in a foreign country the American dollar will fall like a stone."

One certainty when you travel is the moment you arrive in a foreign country the American dollar will fall like a stone.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?"

My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American family. Families aren't dying. They're merging into big conglomerates."

You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American family. Families aren't dying. They're merging into big conglomerates.




Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Housework can kill you if done right."

Housework can kill you if done right.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving."

Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub."

Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown."

Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother."

Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.




Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Never have more children than you have car windows."

Never have more children than you have car windows.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt."

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "I am not a glutton-I am an explorer of food."

I am not a glutton-I am an explorer of food.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one Helen Keller is the other."

Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one Helen Keller is the other.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."

Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars."

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else."

It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial."

Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me."

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time."

Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy."

Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?"

What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "It was a bitter moment for us. We weren't two mature parents. We were just two kids playing grown-up. We still needed Mommy and Daddy's permission, blessings, and money to survive."

It was a bitter moment for us. We weren't two mature parents. We were just two kids playing grown-up. We still needed Mommy and Daddy's permission, blessings, and money to survive.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Family life got better and we got our car back - as soon as we put "I love Mom" on the license plate."

Family life got better and we got our car back - as soon as we put "I love Mom" on the license plate.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "I am not a glutton - I am an explorer of food"

I am not a glutton - I am an explorer of food



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead."

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat."

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes."

I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Grandparenthood is one of life's rewards for surviving your own children."

Grandparenthood is one of life's rewards for surviving your own children.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "There was a time when the one singular thing that held a marriage together was the threat of getting the kids."

There was a time when the one singular thing that held a marriage together was the threat of getting the kids.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Never lend your car to someone you've given birth to."

Never lend your car to someone you've given birth to.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip"

Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip."

One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip.




Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart."

Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them."

All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage."

Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?"

Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "But some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love why some days it's so quiet you don't even know it's there."

But some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love why some days it's so quiet you don't even know it's there.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what."

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday."

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, its unplanned, it's full of suprises."

Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, its unplanned, it's full of suprises.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one."

The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween."

A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween.



Erma Bombeck Quotes: "We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings."

We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings.