You can't expect to hit the jackpot if you don't put a few nickels in the machine.

The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.

Being a comedian is like being a con man. You have to make 'em like you before you can fool 'em.

Violence is a tool of the ignorant.

Funny is an attitude.

Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun.

My main point is to be funny; if I can slip a message in there, fine.

When you're hot, you're hot; when you're not, you're not.

Don't order one for the road, because the road is already laid out.

My show is my statement. What I have to say is on the screen. My life is my own. I don't want to talk about my private self. Why should I?

I was number one in the ratings four times last year and twice this season. What could be more damn equal than that? If they get any more equal, I don't want it.

All games are meaningless if you do not know the rules.

You take unacceptable risk, you have to be prepared to face the consequence.

Satan can make men dance upon the brink of hell as though they were on the verge of heaven.

If your mind is filled with the Word of God, then it can't be filled with impure thoughts.

It is a privilege and an honor to perform on Steinway pianos.

I'm not a fatalist; even if I were, what could I do about it?

I had a nightmare about being on a cruise ship and the ship going down. It was an arduous process of the ship going down and we knew it was going down. There was everyone I know and love on the ship.

Our main work is, by the spirit of God, with the Word of God, to portray the glories of God as more beautiful and more satisfying than anything.

Sometimes in the fashion industry we come across some unfair rules, but no one is obliged to follow them.

I'm committed to try to make the product the best I possibly can.