Toughest job I ever had: selling doors, door to door.

In Unity there is strength; We can move mountains when we're united and enjoy life - Without unity we are victims. Stay united.

Hitler was a vegetarian. Just goes to show, vegetarianism, not always a good thing. Can in some extreme cases lead to genocide.

Add a drop of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it.

Contentment is knowing you're right. Happiness is knowing someone else is wrong.

Three blokes go into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

I'm English and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise.

Orchestras have often been used to conjure up the natural world: Swans, sharks, trout, but not, as far as I know, the often maligned jellyfish.

The day after tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life - that way you've always got a couple of days in hand.

Tonight's show is about doubt. Or maybe it isn't - haven't made my mind up yet.

Three women walk into a pub and say, 'Hooray, we've colonised a male-dominated joke format'

Your job as a young adult is to become as valuable to the marketplace as you can. Your job as a human is to do so without working a day in your life.

And beauty immortal awakes from the tomb.

My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.

How far can you push a rope? Not very far. That's why true influencers don't push.

The way we deal with uncertainty says a lot about whether Jesus is ahead of us leading, or behind us just carrying our stuff.

Blessing is the lifeblood throbbing through the universe.

I live on hairspray. The bigger the hair, the closer to God.

When old friends get together, everything else fades to insignificance."- War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death

When I tap, it means I've accepted the technique, learned the lesson and look to apply the experience next time I step on the mat. I never give up.