The place was so British, I wouldn't have been surprised if the mice wore monocles.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

Live inside your stories, yes, but do not hide behind them.

People always say golfers don't smile. But there is so much psychology in golf so we have to be a bit robotic.

I think some people think that being on television makes you a sitting duck, but you have the right to remain private.

If the world is to save any part of its resources for the future, it must reduce not only consumption but the number of consumers.

Man must become better and more evil.

When you sing in English and Spanish, it's two completely different forms of expression and... even the people who don't speak Spanish love to hear me sing in Spanish.

He who does anything because it is the custom, makes no choice.

When the great Tao is abandoned, benevolence and righteousness arise.

I don't ascribe to any particular style or period.

The American dream has now morphed into an expectation. And if it isn't provided, or if it doesn't happen, then people feel cheated.