The audience was swell. They were so polite they covered their mouths when they yawned.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

Those who have a strong sense of love and belonging have the courage to be imperfect.

Speak blessings, and write wishes. ~T.F. Hodge

Good things happen when you meet strangers.

Politicians have to be committed to people in equal measures.

But if that's what you want to be, that's what you will be - as long as you study.

I'm someone who has a singular goal in making films; I want to tell a story. There are certain stories that I want to tell. Hollywood's never really been the ultimate goal for me.

What is not ex-pressed is de-pressed.

I would like to repeat: I know absolutely nothing about [hacker's attacks], and Russia has never done anything like this at the State level.

My father's songs don't intimidate me; my father's songs are my songs. My songs are his songs. There's no intimidation.