I'm directing the Sky show. I'm not going to be in it. I'm just writing and directing it. So that'll satisfy that part of my brain.

I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people.

Occasionally I'll watch Fox News for as long as I can tolerate it, or CNN. I'll watch until I get infuriated, but you got to know what they're talking about and what they're not talking about.

I like pot, I enjoy pot, I like to smoke it. But, the one thing I don't like about pot is the subculture it's spawned. I think it's embarrassing and really juvenile and uncreative

You cannot win a War on Terrorism. It's like having a war on jealousy.

Sketches have characters, exits, entrances and are vastly different.

We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins.

I hate bumper stickers, you can't sum anything up. All you do is paint yourself in some caricaturist corner.

The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!

The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.

I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.

It's going to be years and years before most people realize how greatly he contributed to American music.

Compassion is the wish to see others free from suffering.

As a kid, I dreamed of a knight in shining armor coming to rescue me. Now, I just dream of equal pay for equal work.

If you're not willing to let your partner see your cellulite or know your biggest fears, then you aren't really ready to share yourself.

There is one thing I know about creative conflict: once my argument is exhausted, I am not going to be unhappy whether it moves in my direction or away.

I'm trying to stay as healthy as possible but there's no pressure to be really skinny. No. That's just a bit wrong.

Laughter and tears may not persuade, but they cannot be refuted.

Wisdom requires no form; her beauty must vary, as varies the beauty of flame. She is no motionless goddess, for ever couched on her throne.

You cannot be anything that you point to.

Avoiding life, avoiding making any concrete plans for your life-that's just one way you're pretending you can keep bad things from happening to you again.