Jack Nicholson Quotes

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend.

People who speak in metaphors should shampoo my crotch.

My whole career strategy has been to build a base so that I could take the roles I want to play. I'd hate to think that a shorter part might not be available because I was worried about my billing.

I'm Irish. I think about death all the time.

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world.

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60.

The minute that you're not learning I believe you're dead.

Human beings are always going to find interesting ways of making a mess of their lives. It's human nature.

I don't think many people have a very good understanding of leisure and the importance it plays in our lives.

Men dominate because of physicality, and thus they have mercy where women do not.

I don’t want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me.

I'm very contra my constituency in terms of abortion because I'm positively against it. I don't have the right to any other view. My only emotion is gratitude, literally, for my life.

I mean, it's real hard to be free when you are bought and sold in the marketplace.

I learned a long time ago in Hollywood that the only person I should vote for is myself.

Son, we live in a world that has walls and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You!?

It's very easy to go down, so always live up. Incline yourself upward.

When we make mistakes they call it evil. When God makes mistakes they call it Nature!

You can call me Joker. And as you can see, I'm a lot happier.

I usually don't get too bogged down with my personal problems because that's a one-way street if you get yourself into a negative frame of mind and only see the dark side of life.

I don't have any plugs or tucks but people do what they want. I look at it as mutilation.

In my last year of school, I was voted Class Optimist and Class Pessimist. Looking back, I realize I was only half right.

You can't handle the truth!

I've always had an urge to feed my need to have fun and feel free. I don't see any interesting alternatives.

Women -- a mistake, or did He do it to us on purpose?

Early on, if I was alone two three nights in a row, I'd start writing poems about suicide.

I'm against cronyism, and I had to learn that early on. Like, I don't have an entourage, because I saw the negative effects of those things.

There's no point dwelling on what might or could have been. You just have to go forward.

The only way to break a bad habit was to replace it with a better habit.

No issue is more compelling than the air we breathe, be it hot or cold, be it hawk or human.

I have never lied to you, I have always told you some version of the truth.

[on the birth of his son after having had two daughters] I finally got it right.

I would never want to vilify somebody who considered abortion murder. I was an illegitimate child myself. I may not have existed today.

A lot of people in the middle of their lives have a secret yearning for more romance.

I always knew there wasn't going to be anybody to help me and emotionally support me, that whatever I did I'd have to do on my own.

We live, we die, and the wheels on the bus go round and round.

Time keeps no measure when true friends are parted, No record day by day; the sands move not for those who, loyal-hearted, friendship's firm laws obey.

Do you think God knew what he was doing when he created woman?

You're anachronistic when you know that your feelings aren't going to have any effect on anything.

Once you've been really bad in a movie, there's a certain kind of fearlessness you develop.

I'm content with the fact that I made a decent effort. That's what I've always worried about: that I wouldn't try hard enough.

A star on a movie set is like a time bomb. That bomb has got to be defused so people can approach it without fear.

Everyone pretty much acknowledges that he's the man, and I still feel that underrates him.

I've never been able to say I've been influenced by a list of artists I like because I like thousands and thousands and I've been influenced in some way by all of them.

Sometimes a bit of distance can be very healthy. You can go away by yourself on a trip and come back very glad to be with your partner because you've cleared your head out of all the negativity.

We learn how to kiss, or to drink, talk to our buddies-all the things that you can't really teach in social studies or history-we all learn them at the movies.

It's not like I'm starved for company - I have a few very good lady friends - but there's only a certain amount of times a woman wants to see you and never go out for dinner.

I'm definitely still wild at heart.

I think the Greeks invented sports as an antidote to philosophy.

There is one thing I know about creative conflict: once my argument is exhausted, I am not going to be unhappy whether it moves in my direction or away.

Everybody's old enough for a beer, ain't that right, Mule?