Having a baby is like a DUI from the universe.

James Franco, acting, teaching, directing, writing, producing, photography, soundtracks, editing - is there anything you can do?

Have you ever noticed that your ugliest friend is the most afraid of getting ruffied? It's like relax. YOU can take the coaster off your drink. There are at least three of us in line ahead of you.

Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.

Justin's fan are called Beliebers because it's politically incorrect to use the word retards.

I'm not saying Martha Stewart is old, but she needs a new Walker more than the 'Fast and Furious' franchise.

Gluten free pizza elicits the same response at a hollywood party that a pile of cocaine did in the 80's.

College seems like a pretty expensive way to become an alcoholic.

If Jesus had known that his image would end up on Justin Bieber's calf, he would've never started Christianity.

Why does every flight attendant seem like they are going through a divorce?

Have you ever noticed that your ugliest friend is most afraid of being raped?

It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.

Love sought is good but given unsought is better.

Artistic development is a thing of the past, sadly.

We're communal animals. If we're by ourselves, we can feel wrong and crazy and out of step with society. We really need those talking circles.

I see music as an aid. It overcomes my internal editor, especially when the music evokes the character or the mood I'm trying to build.

At the beginning of my career, fresh out of college, I did everything that I could do. And now I'm a little bit more selective. I think that's sort of a natural process.

Whatever anyone says, I think the opposite will happen.

The only thing that permits us to acquiesce in an erroneous theory is the lack of a better one, analogously, an injustice is tolerable only when it is necessary to avoid an even greater injustice.

Violence ravaged my life. I was a victim of hatred, and I have dedicated my life to reversing that hatred.

It does not matter whether the worker wants responsibility or not, ...The enterprise must demand it of him.