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Robert Benchley Quotes

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Robert Benchley Quotes: "Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of."

Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of.




Robert Benchley Quotes: "I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well."

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Go jogging? And get hit by a meteor?"

Go jogging? And get hit by a meteor?



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing."

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.




Robert Benchley Quotes: "I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry."

I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children."

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "A great many people have come up to me and asked how I manage to get so much work done and still keep looking so dissipated."

A great many people have come up to me and asked how I manage to get so much work done and still keep looking so dissipated.




Robert Benchley Quotes: "Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment."

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Let's get out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini."

Let's get out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "In America there are two classes of travel - first class and with children."

In America there are two classes of travel - first class and with children.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them."

There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.




Robert Benchley Quotes: "Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other."

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings."

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "There are two kinds of travel: first class and with children."

There are two kinds of travel: first class and with children.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?"

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?



Robert Benchley Quotes: "The only cure for a real hangover is death."

The only cure for a real hangover is death.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Central Park is the grandiose symbol of the front yard each child in New York hasn't got."

Central Park is the grandiose symbol of the front yard each child in New York hasn't got.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death."

A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "Streets flooded. Please advise."

Streets flooded. Please advise.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."

It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.



Robert Benchley Quotes: "New York - The city where the people from Oshkosh look at the people from Dubuque in the next theater seats and say "These New Yorkers don't dress any better than we do."

New York - The city where the people from Oshkosh look at the people from Dubuque in the next theater seats and say "These New Yorkers don't dress any better than we do.