Divorce runs high these days, but I’m an exception to the norm. I got divorced when marriage was still popular.

Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.

The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes.

The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.

Pure joy is rare. That’s why for every meal I eat a really bloody steak.

Mom always said I was born to sit in the electric chair, but I'm proving her wrong. I'm going to die on my knees, begging for my life.

I bet there are a lot of women out there who want to sleep with a guy who reads. And being the head of the reading foundation, I’m very well endowed.

I love working with my hands. My writing is rough, my paper bruised with ink stains.

Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion.

Education: learning to find your purpose. Upon finding your purpose: what did I learn?

If all women revealed their age, men would have nothing to hide from each other.

Sympathy is never wasted except when you give it to yourself.

Prosperity knits a man to the world.

The biggest guru-mantra is: never share your secrets with anybody. It will destroy you.

I was swinging like a toilet door on a prawn trawler.

I think there was a lot competition in the rock scene.

Now and again, it is necessary to seclude yourself among deep mountain and hidden valleys to restore your link to the source of life.

Finding inner success is the best, easiest and infact the only way to achieve and enjoy everything else in life.

Introverts often work more slowly and deliberately. They like to focus on one task at a time and can have mighty powers of concentration . They're relatively immune to the lures of wealth and fame.

We are so curiously made that one atom put in the wrong place in our original structure will often make us unhappy for life.

As in the eye of Nature he has lived, So in the eye of Nature let him die!