All comics want to be musicians. There's a part of me that wants to be a serious musician. I love songs about heartache and heartbreak.

Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

We need to stop telling girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't.

I do love poop. I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants. I enjoy being clever and pithy and political, but nothing's going to get me like dumb stuff.

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.

I hope the Jews did kill Christ, I'd do it again in a second.

Drew Friedman isn't just a brilliant artist. He takes you to a place. He takes you back in time. He makes you smell the stale cigarettes and cold brisket and you say, thank you for the pleasure.

They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

I like talking about things that are taboo, because it makes them not taboo anymore.

You will do extraordinary splendor.

I'm always praying for a part that would be something that I could be really proud of, in which I could use the gifts God gave me in a positive way.

As doctors, we are not trained to communicate and understand the power of our words as they relate to a patient's ability and desire to survive.

people are all there is to an organization

For lust of knowing what should not be known, we take the Golden Road to Samarkand.

Seriously, in America there are more big, curvy girls than there are little girls, and men love us, too.

My parents came from different backgrounds. My father's was grander than my mother's, so my mother had... to put up with the disapproval of my father's relations.

A gentleman has his eyes on all those present; he is tender toward the bashful, gentle toward the distant, and merciful toward the absent.

Say my shoe game nuts so I call em cashews Every other city it's another Nicki tattoo

As long as we love, we lend to the beloved object qualities of mind and heart which we deprive him of when the day of misunderstanding arrives.