Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

If you can't illustrate 'it', 'it' doens't belong in Physics as a noun! You can't put an article in front. You can't put a verb after!

If we were to plot the distance between where you are RIGHT NOW and the nearest good idea, it would describe a line too big to fit inside the universe.

A lot of impulsive mistakes are made by people who simply aren’t willing to stay bored a little longer.

You have to really want and need it before you earn it.

We have some bad hombres here, and we're going to get them out.

What faith has not been used by demagogues as a club over somebody's head?

I know that if I wasn't scared, something's wrong, because the thrill is what's scary.

Curiosity is the main energy.

Of all the things that God has made, the human heart is the one which sheds the most light, alas! and the most darkness.