Whenever someone dies everyone says, I love that guy, except for Jeffrey Dahmer.

I was one of the first veejays to take the camera out on location, and that's what was unique about MTV at that time.

I kind of was raised at The Comedy Store by comedians. When you see my dad on stage before me and then you see me, you'll see where I got a lot of my stuff.

Serious and intense people, they drain you. But someone who's an idiot, like myself, they're fun. You either hate me or you love me.

I want to do an 'Extreme Makeover' show. You know that MTV show 'I Want To Have A Famous Face'? Well, I want to do a new show. I want to have a different famous face.

My mom is two people to me. She's my mom number one, and then she's this lady most comedians know as being a legendary owner of a nightclub that's responsible for starting a lot of heavy careers.

I liked Evel Knievel, and that game Mouse Trap. That was pretty cool.

I giggle when I put myself down. It's just funny to me.

Comedy wasn't something I chose - it chose me.

I'm not used to getting good reviews.

When you're a kid, all you really care about are Slurpees and Slip N Slide and riding your bike, and that's what I did.

Live BOLDLY! ......because no one ever told you healing is a life long process.

But of all the instances of error arising from this physical fancy, the worst is that we have before us: the habit of exhaustively describing a social sickness, and then propounding a social drug.

Unless the she-wolf agrees, there’s always a chance of rejection.

Watching you stand alone, all of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow.

There was no other path for me. I knew this was my path. I had to follow it.

I would prefer to battle the 'I'm special' feeling not by the thought, 'I'm no more special than anyone else,' by by the feeling, 'Everyone is as special as me.'

The tradition of always looking for the answer in the most fundamental way available - that is a great tradition, and it saves a lot of time in this world.

Whales who come up and spout off get harpooned.

There's a lot of talk these days about giving children self-esteem. It's not something you can give; it's something they have to build.