-'What do ties matter, Jeeves, at a time like this?' There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

. . .but he'd seen elite warriors go down in flames enough times to struggle with the sovereignty of God yet yield to it

It’s not possible for a person who has one to one fellowship with God, someone who breaks through in prayer and who knows how to wait for God not to have open success. It’s just not possible!

King was a transformed person. Evil was no longer a theory.

The appropriate age for marrige is around eighteen and thirty-seven for man

In fact what I would like to see is thousands of computer scientists let loose to do whatever they want. That's what really advances the field.

I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.

Good people always rise to your level of expectation.

Don't wait for a light to appear at the end of the tunnel, stride down there and light the bloody thing yourself.

Prose on certain occasions can bear a great deal of poetry; on the other hand, poetry sinks and swoons under a moderate weight of prose.

I do not prize the word cheap. It is not a word of inspiration. It is the badge of poverty, the signal of distress. Cheap merchandise means cheap men and cheap men mean a cheap country.