That's the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm.

Children see magic because they look for it.

It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.

... but to remain historically accurate, I would have had to leave out an important question that I felt needed to be addressed, which is, 'What if Jesus had known kung fu?

The Angel Gabriel disappeared once for sixty years and they found him on earth hiding in the body of a man named Miles Davis.

She hugged me and I could feel the heat rise in my face, either from shame or love, like there was a difference.

Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say "attaboy".

The medium obscured the message.

If there was anything I learned from John the Baptist, it was that the sooner you confess a mistake, the quicker you can get on to making new and better mistakes.

Routine feeds the illusion of safety...

Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him....

We do things we’re not proud of. Nikolas more than most.

Suspense is very important. Even though this is humor and they're short stories, that theory of building suspense is still there.

To fulfill a dream, to be allowed to sweat over lonely labor, to be given a chance to create, is the meat and potatoes of life. The money is the gravy.

But the one thing that has power completely is love, because when a man loves, he seeks no power, and therefore he has power.

The hope is that if we can increase youthfulness, we can postpone age-related diseases.

We need an approach to ethics which makes no recourse to religion and can be equally acceptable to those with faith and those without.

I think it is nice for people to appreciate a slow-burning, beautiful story that makes you feel good when it is over.

Beyond the ten thousand states of mind is the still point. It exists within them all, yet beyond them. It is not affected by them. It gives birth to them. This is the riddle.

Now God has never shouted out to me. I've never heard God speak audibly. He doesn't have to.

As the palm-tree standeth so straight and so tall, The more the hail beats, and the more the rains fall.