TV's sameness has destroyed many things, such as the American urge toward independent thought.

The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost.

The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.

Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you.

For me, a hearty "belly laugh" is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.

Good manners: The noise you don't make when you're eating soup.

Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.

There once was a student named Bessor Whose knowledge grew lessor and lessor. It at last grew so small He knew nothing at all, And today he's a college professor!

Politicians are like ships: noisiest when lost in a fog.

In a notable family called Stein There were Gertrude, and Ep, and then Ein. Gert's writing was hazy, Ep's statues were crazy, And nobody understood Ein.

Football season: The only time of the year when a man can walk down the street with a blond on one arm and a blanket on the other without encountering raised eyebrows.

It would be, for me, mere pointless pleasure, an illusion of order for this one frail, foolish, flicker-flash in the long dull fall of eternity.

Life will be a whole lot better if we understand what our salvation in Christ means.

The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.

I don't like it when it stings, ' he said. 'Nobody does.

No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.

I'm a big fan of old boots.

University printing presses exist, and are subsidised by the Government for the purpose of producing books which no one can read; and they are true to their high calling.

It's my experience that people are a lot more sympathetic if they can see you hurting.

I thus decided to leave the university forever and tried to find an industrial job in the United States.

The sky's the limit for all Americans if we have the right kind of leadership.