Science teachers and the mentally ill, that's all Jazz is for.

People said, ‘You must be mad, or on drugs,’ which I found a bit disappointing. What about imagination? It reflects our time that people sooner assume you’re on drugs or mad, rather than free.

No means yes in grasshopper language.

Reality depresses me. I need to find fantasy worlds and escape in them.

It's impossible to be unhappy while wearing a poncho!

All my friends got dogs and cats for Christmas, and I got a starfish called Roy. I used to take him down to the park on a lead.

When I'm 70 I might be a man in a park just wandering around, speaking in tongues with kids throwing bread at me.

Never try and go on a solo mission on your own.

I've had a really weird day, some joker threw bamboo in the penguin enclosure. They all vaulted out. It was a nightmare, it took me all morning to get them back in.

I don't really like jokes in a way. I mean gags are fine but I like weird moments where what you have isn't really a joke, just tiny moments.

I've got it all in here ultra violets, flying saucers, strawberry bootlace come on get involved.

Politics is about the participation and engagement of the wider citizenry - to miss that point would doom us to irrelevance.

Virtual reality has nothing on Calvin.

The more uncomfortable I feel, that's where I know the magic is.

Luck and destiny are the excuses of the world's failures.

Short stories do not say this happened and this happened and this happened. They are a microcosm and a magnification rather than a linear progression.

I'll start drinking tea over coffee when the big hand is on Never and the little hand is on Ain't Gonna Happen.

Herewith I offer you the Omnipotent Finger of God in the anatomy of a louse: wherein you will find miracles heaped on miracles and will see the wisdom of God clearly manifested in a minute point.

Sometimes the best things are the ones that aren’t planned, the decisions made while living in the moment.

Give me better wood and I will make you a better cabinet.

Finding tricks to create flattering body shape is the key to style.