My wife told me that in the Bible, Abraham circumcised himself... wow! I can't even get to the bank before it closes.

The appetizer is just an excuse for an extra meal. Let's see, I will start with the eighty buffalo wings.

Yeah the appetizer, that's the food we eat before we have our food...No no you're thinking of dessert, that's food we eat after we have our food.

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.

Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.

I talk kinda slow, especially for the Northeast, so it was a way to beat [would-be hecklers] to the punch.

My favorite vegetable is the marshmallow.

The only advantage to wearing glasses is that you can do that dramatic removal.

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.

One of the benefits of eating salad is that you can eat tons of it and never be satisfied.

In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.

An intensely gripping narrative...expertly crafted and totally addictive...a must read!

Life is a vacation to enjoy the beauty of life.

If you want to grow, you must learn to let go.

I'm living the American dream.

Bond is the longest-running franchise ever and there's a reason for that: they are action movies but they are also touched by current events without being political or too serious.

We like to see others, but don't like others to see through us.

I may appear to be an eccentric old man... But this is a free choice.

The key word about The West Wing is show. It is not a reality show. It has nothing to do with reality.

It's our landscape which defines our identity and it's what I'm most grateful for.

People can be slave-ships in shoes.