I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

History, ' Mari muttered, as if she'd overheard his thoughts. 'Why do we need to know what happened before we were born?' 'So hopefully we get smarter and don't make the same mistakes again.

To the victors belong the spoils.

Nothing will deter us from building the future we want for our children. What greater rejection of those who would tear down our world than marshaling our best efforts to save it.

Ireland is where strange tales begin and happy endings are possible.

I was swinging like a toilet door on a prawn trawler.

Illness is the great equalizer. It doesn't matter who you are, rich or poor, young or old, fat or thin, sick is sick.

Liberty, once lost, is lost forever.

Research cannot be forced very much. There is always danger of too much foliage and too little fruit.

Don't let the clothes or anyone define you...just be yourself whether in a pair of jeans or a ball gown.

In my mind, I've always been an A-list Hollywood superstar. Y'all just didn't know yet.