Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.

Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.

Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.

When in doubt or danger, run in circles, scream and shout.

A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.

There are two kinds of failures: those who thought and never did, and those who did and never thought

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.

His soul was swimming in the maelstrom to keep her swim in the peaceful end!" ~ AB

It is a rare privilege to watch the birth, growth, and first feeble struggles of a living mind; this privilege is mine.

I hate Iran. I hate the Iranian government. It's a cruel and evil government.

Last night at Carnegie Hall, Jack Benny played Mendelssohn. Mendelssohn lost.

The whole idea is to earn the flavor. No one gives it to you.

Leo Connellan has retained his soul and voice in Provincetown and Other Poems.

There is no need of a teacher for those who know how to think.

The eros of advertising is lurid but not specific.

I would cancel dialysis to be in the [hopefully upcoming Firefly] movie.

It wasn't until my second year that I got to actually work with Church.