Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if they wanted to be one?

Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

My grandfather always said, Don't watch your money, watch your health. So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.

Ladies and gentlemen, you can't please everyone. Take my girlfriend - I think she's the most remarkable woman in the world. . . . That's me . . . But to my wife . . .

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.

Blacks can get into medical school with a lower grade ... If that's true, a Jew should be able to play basketball with a lower net.

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

On the murder of New York deli owner Abe Lebewohl: It's almost like wiping out Carnegie Hall. A sandwich to a Jew is just as important as a country to a Gentile.

My father was a very successful businessman, but he was ruined in the stock market crash. A big stockbroker jumped out the window and fell on his pushcart.

America is the only country in the world where you can burn the flag but can't tear the tag off the mattress.

...There is no greater dividing force in this world than self-interest....

One of the happiest moments in a father's life is when his children treat him like a brother.

Why do you do it, Amber? Why do you go after people like you do? It’s not who you are.”“That’s the point, ” Amber said. “I’m not allowed to be who I really am.

Only those who are truly aware of their sin can truly cherish grace.

The idea that there could be other universes out there is really one that stretches the mind in a great way.

Leeds is a great club and it's been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesborough.

Amethyst is a meditative and calming stone that works in the emotional, spiritual, and physical planes to provide calm, balance, patience, and peace.

There is no reward so delightful, no pleasure so exquisite, as having one's work known and acclaimed by those whose applause confers honor.

EXTREMELY FUNNY! A SUPER-VIRTUOSO! I expected to enjoy 'The Two and Only,' but I didn't expect to be touched, much less to find my eyes growing moist.

If you know where your spiritual center is, and you neglect it, peace will always allude you.