All that glitters is sold as gold.

Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.

Middle-age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, were it not for making living, which is rather a nouciance.

The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Behold the Zebra on the plains, And shudder at his mighty manes!

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.

When I remember bygone days I think how evening follows morn So many I loved were not yet dead, So many I love were not yet born.

Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

Like the sun, touch someone with the warmth of your kindness.

The history books which contain no lies are extremely tedious

Her face was her chaperone.

Institutions do all the things that are supposed to be bad. They impede personal exploration. They enforce conformity. But they often save us from our weaknesses and give meaning to life.

I wish I were worthy of his love. (Any love.)I should tell him to run. But I can't. I need him.

Through my handicaps, I have found my self, my work, my God.

No sciences are better attested than the religion of the Bible.

If you want a particular behavior from someone else, try spotlighting those times when he or she is already doing it.

Every responsible chief in the CIA knows that the more covert the action, the greater the need for a clear policy and a defined target.

Comedy is much more difficult than tragedy-and a much better training, I think. It's much easier to make people cry than to make them laugh.