A man never becomes an orator if he has anything to say.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

A man's idea in a game of cards is war, cruel, devastating, and pitiless. A lady's idea of it is a combination of larceny, embezzlement and burglary.

A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.

The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here.

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.

An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.

Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.

I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.

You have to be adroit and also patient to make others agree to your terms.

Love as if your life depends on it. He already showed you how.

Don't just discover . . . Encounter!

I kept having chills. This was in the middle of the summer and I was wearing a sheepskin jacket and I was chilling. I was shaking all over.

Only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches.

Everything I own can fit in two suitcases and a foot locker.

If we have love and compassion in our hearts, then we will wholeheartedly serve those who suffer from lack of food, clothing and shelter.

If you want magic, let go of your armor. Magic is so much stronger than steel.

Guy goes into a bar with a duck under his arm. Bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig?" Guy says, "This is a duck." Bartender says, "I was talking to the duck."

Racing is life. Everything else is just waiting.