Peter Sellers Quotes

You have to live before you die, or you'll die before you live.

There is no me. I do not exist. There used to be a me but I had it surgically removed.

If I can't really find a way to live with myself, I can't expect anyone else to live with me.

Some forms of reality are so horrible we refuse to face them, unless we are trapped into it by comedy. To label any subject unsuitable for comedy is to admit defeat.

It won't be easy, that is why I have always failed where others have succeeded.

I am here to fix the problem with yer pheaun.

Conversation like television set on honeymoon... unnecessary.

To label any subject unsuitable for comedy is to admit defeat.

Finally, in conclusion, let me say just this.

I'm a classic example of all humorists - only funny when I'm working.

Facts - behind them lies the whole fabric of deductive truth.

François: Do you know what kind of a bomb it was? Clouseau: Yes, the exploding kind.

Is there anybody hiding there in the dark?

Now then, what do we know? One, that Professor Fassbinder and his daughter have been kidnapped. Two, that someone has kidnapped them. Three, that my hand is on fire.

If you ask me to play myself, I will not know what to do. I do not know who or what I am.

Women are more difficult to handle than men. It's their minds.

Relax, I'll get it. (said to Kato after Clouseau knocks him unconscious)

I feel ghostly unreal until I become somebody else again on the screen.

We don't want to start a nuclear war unless we really have to, now do we Jack?

When you have been killed as many times as I have, you get used to it.

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.

You'll catch your death of cold. Clouseau: Yes, yes I probably will but . . . its all part of life's rich pageantry, you kneau.

To see me as a person on screen would be one of the dullest experiences you could ever wish to experience.

There is no me. I do not exist. There used to be a me, but I had it surgically removed