You can always tell when someone's lying to you, because they're male.

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

Don't compare yourself with someone else's version of happy or thin. Accepting yourself burns the most calories.

Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on a date.

I constantly walk into a room and I don't remember why. But for some reason, I think there's going to be a clue in the fridge.

I lied on my Weight Watchers list. I put down that I had 3 eggs... but they were Cadbury chocolate eggs.

I always feel slightly sorry to be the voice of whatever I'm experiencing.

I'd like a pop-up magazine with 45 articles on Russell Crowe. I'm like a teenager. I'd have 'Teen Beat' if I could, for grown-ups.

Before we got engaged, he never farted. Now it's a second language.

I grew up thinking that if I wanted to go be prime minister, I could.

I always like to think I'm having a dinner party, and I'm the host, and the audience are my guests.

Not aptitude....attitude is the criterion for success.

She listens to the delicate fluttering of sparrows' wings, tiny messengers. The sound reminds her of life - struggling, beating, rising, flying, and now dissolving into space.

I think that's why art prevails: because it helps people in a fairly intangible, magical way feel more connected to each other.

I tried Botox once. Never again. It made my forehead freeze.

Neville will play Quidditch for England before Hagrid lets Dumbledore down.

I spent years crying in my diary. But I finally stopped finding fault with myself. We're all different, yet the same.

You can boast about anything if it's all you have. Maybe the less you have, the more you are required to boast.

Just as the value of a house lies in its location, The value of a mind lies in its depth, The value of giving lies in the presence of a generous spirit, The value of words lies in their reliability.

Age is nothing, can still win the Grand Slam, pretty happy about my age, more experience.

I write because I write - as anyone in the arts does. You're a painter because you feel you have no choice but to paint. You're a writer because this is what you do.