Yale men do not like to be told anything by people who didn't go to Yale. The closest I came to Yale was once I had one of their padlocks.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.

There's an old saying, 'Life begins at forty.' That's silly. Life begins every morning you wake up.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.

I get up every morning and read the obituary column. If my name's not there, I eat breakfast.

Politicians who took us to war should have been given the guns and told to settle their differences themselves, instead of organising nothing better than legalised mass murder.

A hedge knight must hold tight to his pride. Without it, he was no more than a sellsword

The sage has one advantage: he is immortal. If this is not his century, many others will be.

Originality is so hip and cool, but to be original you must dare to be corny.

The only purpose of advertising is to make sales. It is profitable or unprofitable according to its actual sales.

Ultimately we need to recognize that while humans continue to build urban landscapes, we share these spaces with others species.

If a man teach uprightly and walk crookedly, more will fall down in the night of his life than he built in the day of his doctrine.

It's been so long since you last saw each other. She could at least smile.

God wants us to respond in wholehearted love because it is who He is and who He created us to be.

If you rest in the silence inside, all those you meet will have their spiritual hearts resuscitated.