Vampires have bright eyes glistening white teeth unnaturally smooth skin and a certain animal magnetism. If they aren't pretty they starve. It's sort of like life in Los Angeles.

I think the very word stalking implies that you're not supposed to like it. Otherwise, it would be called 'fluffy harmless observation time'.

I am a disaster magnet. I came home from our first anniversary vacation with jellyfish stings, a puncture wound from a wrought iron pineapple and a cork-shaped bruise in my cleavage.

There's an inverse relationship between my temper and my ability to control my accent. If you hear me say 'Fiddledeedee', run for the hills, because I'm getting ready to take out bystanders.

The brain may die, but my compulsion for useless trivia lives on.

If you want to hurt me, fine. Take my books. Burn down my house. Shave my head while I am sleeping. But nobody, nobody screws with my dog.

You can take the girl out of the library, but you can’t take the neurotic, compulsively curious librarian out of the girl.

To say I had some pent-up anger would be like saying Britney Spears had minor impulse-control issues.

You can't worry about the future so much that you miss out on the present.

Does Hallmark make a “Sorry I tried to drink your blood and touched you in a vaguely inappropriate manner” card? I settled for “How much do you remember?

Did I just get psychically pimp-slapped by a little old lady?

Killing is not so easy as the innocent believe.

If you believe getting close to being 50 is bad... wait to see how one feels when getting far crom that age

Joley likes to be scared, and she can't watch them alone." "I don't know how you can make that sound perfectly logical.

I am a rubbish flirt.

I can't tell you if the use of force in Iraq today will last five days, five weeks or five months, but it won't last any longer than that.

Every Englishman believes that Handel now occupies an important position in heaven. If so, le bon Dieu must feel toward him very much as Louis Treize felt toward Richelieu.

If we want everything to remain as it is, it will be necessary for everything to change.

I am a writer, not a transcriber.

Believe me; all evil comes from the old. They grow fat on ideas and young men die of them.

Ah, let us kiss each other's eyes,/And laugh our love away.