Thinking. This book contains some. Whether you try it at home is up to you.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

I let myself have feelings for you despite not knowing how this would end.

Each day is always breaking out anew Aspirations swirling round what you do

Striving for perfection can get in the way during the early stages of the creative process.

German economic salvation has been brought about solely through the efforts of the German people and the experience they have gained. Countries abroad have contributed nothing to this.

One pretends to do something, or copy someone or some teacher, until it can be done confidently and easily in what becomes one's own style

I think ABC sort of hoped I would be really like Carol Burnett. I mean literally, I think.

They don't make you what you are, you do. You are what you choose to be.

All those people who go around saying Life begins at forty, they're notable by their absence. The nerve.

I'm born in Liverpool, I'm a Liverpool supporter.

Give to these children, new from the world, Rest far from men. Is anything better, anything better? Tell us it then.