There was an old Woman who lived in a shoe She had so many children Her government subsidy check came to $4,892.

Don't watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.

The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.

If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.

Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.

It's a good thing that when God created the rainbow he didn't consult a decorator or he would still be picking colors.

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.

You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.

Siblings: children of the same parents, each of whom is perfectly normal until they get together.

We may not always see eye to eye, but we can try to see heart to heart.

We must pray in order to grow, and we must grow because Infinite Love will not, cannot, settle for less than the greatest joy of which his beloved creature is capable.

If you relax your mind, it can begin working for you.

When all else fails...try smoking a good cigar and have a stiff drink. If that doesn't work...have another.

I am conscious of the fact that the subject of hell is not a very pleasant one. It is very unpopular, controversial and misunderstood.... As a minister, I must deal with it. I cannot ignore it.

As you become more proficient, fewer people can offer you advice, although in truth, that's when you need it the most because the stakes just keep getting higher and higher.

Red lipstick is instant glamour.

It is this quality, the power of seeing order in apparent confusion, that has marked the work of all great men.

....I realized I actually had a choice in what I could believe.

The Kantian philosophy is no more than at best a half-secularized version of such a theocratic ethics, with "Reason" in the place of God. This does not amount to much more than a change of names.

It took Jimmy Carter to give us Ronald Reagan.