Republicans want smaller government for the same reason crooks want fewer cops; it's easier to get away with murder.

The voter is basically dumb and lazy. The reason I became a Democratic operative instead of a Republican was because there were more Democrats that didn’t have a clue than there were Republicans.

Drag a $100 bill through a trailer camp and there's no telling what you will find.

If Hillary gave up one of her balls and gave it to Obama, he'd have two.

Don't get mad. Don't get even. Just get elected, then get even.

Winning an argument with your wife is like winning the war with Iraq. Once you win, you're in even more trouble.

Never underestimate people.

Washington is a dirty diaper. It's time for a change.

If you say three things, you don't say anything.

When the facts change, you change your mind. I know that is a hard concept for people to get sometimes.

Sometimes a mind is like a mouth: you just got to shut it.

He had then warned his daughter not to violate the Eleventh Commandment."Which one is that?" I asked her."Do not bullshit thy father, " she said.

Life becomes harder for us when we live for others but it also becomes richer and happier.

The horse, the horse! The symbol of surging potency and power of movement, of action.

Shout out to the fathers that didn't raise us

I have a lot of Japanese friends: I grew up in Vancouver, and there's this huge Japanese population over there.

It’s a world where high school students look roughly twenty-four.

I always took pictures, but about five or six years ago, I started taking more behind the scenes at SNL, and now I have some 60,000 photos sitting on my laptop.

I can't think of a more wonderful thanksgiving for the life I've had than that everyone should be jolly at my funeral.

All we have to do to create the future is to change the nature of our conversations, to go from blame to ownership, and from bargaining to commitment, and from problem solving to possibility.

Honor your humanness and all of your feelings - the messy ones, the growing pains, the ache - because we can't have the dark without the light.